Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Randomize
