I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
