handjob tips. give me some.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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