She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
