I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
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