I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize
