Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize