he wants to bone in the snuggie
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize