he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
Randomize