She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
