Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
