I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
never play flip cup with pint glasses
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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