Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
