Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize
