A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
