Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
