I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
