Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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