she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Randomize