i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
