Whod you bang
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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