We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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