I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
