He disabled his match.com account in front of me
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Randomize
