And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
