I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
Randomize
