And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
