we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
ttyl tear gas
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
