I'll bet she douches with gravy.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
