I want to walk on stilts...naked
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
