I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
