i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
