I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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