Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
