I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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