I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
My vagina just clenched in fear
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
