Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
