So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
