they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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