How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
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