You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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