I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
