never play flip cup with pint glasses
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Randomize
