I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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