So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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