He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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