There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Randomize
