just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize