he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Randomize