btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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