apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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